part of you is just a lil bit rebellious

A bit too indie, a bit too full of love, a bit too poetic, and every adjustments that are created exceed the normal margin.

What if, all you ever believe at the end hits you really hard, knocks you down. You lie down watching the stars, scratching the gap between your eyebrows, and decide to start noticing that stars that are seen might probably be dead now and all the dead stars are there just to set the sky to be a little bit starry, their existence are recognized after like, what, twenty thousand years. With all the hours that have been spent, you try to compensate in just a single night, to have a little conversation with yourself.

You do want something. Something deep, but simple to be explained. It is so light you can explain it to your kids, but as well heavy to share it with your future wife's parents.Just a little bit of ego that never dominates you for twenty one years, just a little bit of lust, but you always need a pack of self control. 

So your journey begins. Your last semester in the university, your CV is now well written according to your perspective, your girlfriend is supporting you (now), friends are scattered, and your parents talk to you more frequent than ever. You're supposed to be a grown up with their wrinkle worrying forehead, ah lovely young man they say.

And live your life to your heart's content. Maybe I need like a year, to have a moment in my life, to slow things down, to exclude myself from the needs to exceed achieve expectations or even gain recognition from people whom I hate. To live without fear, but on the other hand without being such those dicks.

Maybe I should start seeking material things, maybe all I ever really want to have are a good sofa, my eyes without glasses, road without heavy traffic, a good loyal loving wife, and a dishwasher. Maybe, if you go to a market nearby, you'll find your purpose of life there, maybe.

It's all constant delusion that is eating your reality. So you assume this thing is a bit too much of reality that you should worry all day all night.